In June 2011, I was diagnosed with Stage IV Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, a blood cancer which had spread to my bone marrow. Receiving this diagnosis was no easy pill to swallow. I was scared, confused and angry. I had never even heard of Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. I was plagued with so many questions and answers couldn’t come fast enough. I immediately sank into a deep, dark depression for a period of two weeks after my diagnosis. In the meantime, I was put on the fast track to treatment, getting a port surgically implanted in my chest in preparation for my first of twelve chemotherapy treatments a few weeks later. The thought of receiving chemo terrified me as I’d been vaguely familiar with its toxicity and overwhelming side-effects. I had enough of being strangled by all these emotions. I decided to combat fear by immersing myself in my creativity, in this case, photo-documenting my journey through self-portraiture. I wanted to “see” myself as I faced cancer.
The self-portraits that appear here capture not only my physical being, but also show my relationship with my resilient spirit as well as my inner reflections as I battled cancer. I like to think that these self-portraits and keeping in touch with my creativity was just as important as the chemotherapy in terms of healing and an eventual cure. Today, a year later, I’m happy to say that my cancer is in remission!
