Simone and LordeA monthly column about sexuality, womanhood, and power by Rahima Rice.
After my divorce, I decided to put myself first. It felt like the natural first step to freedom. For many years my natural inclination to nurture showed up in my romantic relationships as enabling. I lost myself in the emotionally draining problems of lovers who depended on my presence — or so I believed. I was stuck so deep in the muck that break-ups felt like I was losing a child. I was convinced my past loves would be lost without me, without the repetition of my care. But, alas, they were fine. Moved on. Lived happy lives. Running into a fully transformed ex, enamored with another, is the perfect cure for a broken heart. It’s the necessary realization that their world never truly revolved around me. I was vital, in the moment, and my lingering pain should perish as quickly as they liquidated the idea of us.
Coming in Third: Truths About Dating a Solo Parent | By Rahima Rice | Simone and Lorde | The Daring
There's no sugarcoating this: you won’t be a single parent’s first priority. That spot is reserved for them, with their kid a close second. Coming in third is your best spot in this race.